December 1, 2009
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Things We Don’t See (SH 51)
The train was crowded like it usually is during rush hour. All of the seats were taken and there were several people standing up. After a few stops, I was able to sit down. A girl who had been standing next to me sat down next to me. She was intently studying a book about walking tours in Japan. The book had maps inside of it. She traced her fingers slowly over the map. She would flipped forward a few pages and then back a few pages like she was really studying it hard. After a few more stops, she put her head down and looked like she was crying or at least on the verge of crying. She got off a few stops later.
Growing up in this area, one thing everyone seems to implicitly understand is that you don’t involve yourself in other people’s business. Everyone seems to be in their own little bubble here. Over the years I have simply learned to accept this. In a way, this crowd is probably one of the safest places in the world if you want to be alone with your feelings. You may be elbow to elbow with a bunch of people but everyone seems to be about a million miles away physically.
Although it didn’t stop me from wondering why she was crying and why she was studying the travel book so intently. My slightly overactive imagination started in on overdrive. Had she planned a trip to Japan and couldn’t go? Was something preventing her from going? Was she supposed to go with someone who no longer was going? Was she supposed to go with a lover who was now an ex? Was she still going to go without that person? If she went, would she be lonely?
We can hardly know a person’s back story from simply sitting next to them. There are too many things that we don’t see. I always have to wonder what I’m missing.
Comments (16)
Sounds like England
I think it is the same her in Singapore. People just mind their own business, too much at times that we don’t offer help or assistance even when help is needed. People just observe and move on. It’s sad in a way.
I would have been really tempted to say “are you ok?”
I wonder what I am missing too. All the time. This is great! Glad you are playing again : )
yes. what are we missing when we see another person?
really nice writing!
j.
I think this is why you are such a thoughtful person, Meg. You really empathize with others and consider what might be in their hearts. That’s a wonderful quality.
I guess that’s how it works on trains everywhere. A lot of people on a crowded space trying desperately to ignore themselves. We do miss a lot that way. Nice work.
Whole seperate world…. I don’t having alone time, but I gotta talk some time.
only on trains, though? because i could be walking in the street, and i see someone’s face, and i’d start thinking about why have this expression, or why they do something a certain way..
i guess it’s just curiousity. who doesn’t want to know what they’re missing?
I’m not sure I could have resisted asking what was wrong…
I hope she is ok and wonder if she was crying and why. We all travel in our own little worlds and that is so sad.
@icepearlz - It is sad. I fancy myself a pretty nice person but there seems to be an invisible wall between everyone on the train.
@blazintommyd - Never been but I can see why you would say that from what I’ve heard.
@butshebites -@angi1972 - @stixandstonz2009 - I was quite tempted but by the time I finally got the courage up, she was leaving
@MooncatBlue - I’m excited! Thanks for doing this again
@speraquodvereor - Thank you *blush*
@christao408 - Thank you *blushes again*
@eve1684 - Yeah, it’s really easy to get lost in your own world on the train.
@sir_spamalot - Truly!
@theuncomposedepitaph - I do that as well. I love people watching mostly because I’m curious about other people.
@TheCheshireGrins - Quentin Crisp had a story about the differences between riding on a bus in London and one in NYC I was fortunate enough to meet him at a signing after one of his shows – he made a big impact on me since I saw the film about him with John Hurt
a lovely read here. though i understand the socialized nature of group dynamics i often wonder if what we are missing isn’t an opportunity to find an important part of ourself.
@bumblefish - You make a very excellent point. You’ve definitely given me something to ponder now.
Without breaking the glass, perhaps you could tap on the window and just ask! –BTB