February 18, 2011
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Mom Wants Mentally Challenged Daughter Sterilized
I came across this article the other day. Basically, the mother of a 21 year old mentally challenged woman in the UK is currently asking for the court ordered sterilization of her daughter. The daughter currently has two children that the mother has to take care of because the daughter is incapable of doing it herself due to her mental handicap (the article does not say what the specific issue is). The daughter has refused birth control such as Depo Provera in the past. The mother says that she does not have the income to support anymore of her daughter’s children.
To me, sterilization is kind of a sticky topic. Should anyone ever be able to make the decision to have another person sterilized? Where is that line? I can definitely see where the mother is coming from. According to the article, the daughter doesn’t seem to understand why having so many kids so quickly is such an issue.
This isn’t exactly related but sort of in the same vein. After the Arizona shootings last month, I got to thinking a lot about people with mental illnesses and mental challenges and how once those people reach adulthood how there is little to nothing that families can do if they don’t get treatment or they go off their medicine or something like that. The issue of mental challenges is even stickier. Where is that line between when you are able or unable to make decisions for yourself? Does anyone have the ability to make the decision of whether or not you should be making decisions? In a way, this situation is sort of like these ones.
To me, this situation is one where there isn’t really a precedent as to what should happen to the daughter. I would hope that the mother would be able to eventually convince her daughter to get Depo Provera or something like that. Sterilization just seems so final and not like a decision that someone should be making for someone else.
What are your thoughts?
Comments (17)
Crap. I have no answer for this. While I think Mom wanting to sterilize
her daughter is… extreme, I can’t blame her because it seems like the
daughter lacks the mental capacity to consider the consequences of what she is doing…
Man, that sucks. I wish the girl would submit to voluntary sterilization. Good job finding a doozy of a question. Have a great weekend!
Strangely enough, a friend and I have had this discussion more than once. She is the mother of a child with Autism who is quickly reaching adulthood physically while still mentally the age of a six year old.
I don’t think I have an answer. I can certainly see where the mother is coming from. Her daughter is unable to care for the children and most likely doesn’t even understand the reality of being a mother. It is a very slippery slope that I pray I never have to navigate.
This is really tough. I’m more on the side of the mom, in the sense that she is the one who has to take care of the children and be their mother. The daughter seems to just be the carrier. However, it’s still a matter of permanently altering someone else’s body, and that doesn’t seem ethical.
Perhaps these children can be put up for adoption.
the question is if she is mental how she has 2 kids at the age of 21?? I mean who does that thing to her? is she subject to rape too??
@Redshirte - It’s definitely hard. I’m wondering if the court even has the power to order anything along those lines.
@BoureeMusique - Yeah, I wish she would submit to that as well. It really makes me wonder about her mental challenge.
@gwacemom@momaroo - Yes, I definitely see where the mom is coming from. I don’t think it’s ever a great situation when a family’s finances are stretched so much that they can’t properly take care of their children. I truly hope that this not a situation that many have to navigate. I can’t imagine how hard the decision must be.
@airbornerose - There was a line in the article about how the mom had suggested adoption and the daughter would not agree to that because “they’re her babies” even though she can’t take care of them. I definitely see where the mom is coming from and I wish that there were a better alternative than sterilization because like you said, it’s a little extreme. Thanks for the rec!
@alwateen - I thought about that as well. I don’t know if it’s a situation where the mother doesn’t know who her daughter is having sex with or what. There wasn’t any mention of the mom even considering speaking to the man or men that her daughter is having sex with.
I came here because of a rec. This is indeed a sticky question. How do you go about it. Say if she was 16-18 then I would side more to the mom and get this done. She is 21 though but in-capable of caring for her own children. This is also not right just to be able to have babies and have some one take care of them for you. I guess if I was to judge which way to go… I would side with the Mom.
I think that yes, in the case of a severely mentally handicapped person- one that cannot support themselves or live by themselves- sterilization should be not only available, but mandatory. My thinking is this: While it does sound awful to require a person to be sterilized, it’s more awful to require another person or the state to continuously raise children that they didn’t choose to have. That’s basically what this daughter is doing, though she doesn’t understand it- she is taking away her mother’s right to NOT have any more children.
In my mind this is a slippery slope towards eugenics. If the court allows this who is to say the next the court could site this as precedent to have a handicapped person sterilized before they can reproduce. Of course somebody can play politics with that and before you know it only certain “chosen” people are allowed to breed….
Why not give the children up for adoption?
When I read the headline, my first thought was “Of course not!!!” But then reading the details of the case, it became abundantly clear just how complex the situation is. If I had to make a decision, though, I would have to still answer “No, the government cannot force someone to be sterilized.”
There are other ways to intervene, including taking the children away or even placing the young lady into protective care, but human history has too many examples of forced sterilization that prove to be poor precedents to follow.
@DivineCaesar44 - Exactly – eventually the government decides that someone who doesn’t have a certain IQ level should not have children, then someone who is unable to walk, then someone who doesn’t have blond hair and blue eyes. We’ve been down this path before and had best learn from history.
hard to know.
I honestly feel like she should get sterilzed. I mean, if the girl isn’t capable of taking care of the kids and the mother is the one supporting them.. obviously something needs to be done. maybe not sterilization but something..
There’s so much not said in the story. What is considered mentally challenged? She is going out and (voluntarily?) having sex. If there was a was a way to enforce birth control, that would be a bit easier. Once she is pregnant, is she able to care for her unborn baby? Is she on medications for her illness that could cause injury to the fetus and result in bringing more challenged children into the family?
Not quite the same, but a childhood friend of mine developed a severe crack problem and kept having baby after baby.Eight in total. The last three were carried and born while she was addicted and using. One in particular has permanent damage. Her mother went to the courts begging them to enforce sterlization… where does one draw the line? And then what happens when that line is drawn and keeps being moved back, little by little, until as stated above, we have a situation reminiscent of Eugenics?
Maybe not sterilization, but possibly having an IUD implanted at her next girly-doctor visit. I know it sounds a little unethical, but the girl doesn’t sound like she’s a capable adult or a mother, and her mom doesn’t sound like she can handle any more children. The girl wouldn’t even have to know it’s being implanted.
@looking_inside_me - That’s the way that I lean. I wish the article had more information as to what the daughter’s mental disability is. That might give more insight into what I would choose. Thanks for stopping by!
@MrsJenBean - Yeah, I feel bad about the mom having to take up the responsibility. I just really wish that there were something else that could be done. Sterilization just seems so final. I hope that eventually the daughter can be convinced to be given birth control of some kind. Thank you for the rec!
@DivineCaesar44 - @christao408 - It’s definitely a hard decision and I definitely thought about the precedence of forced sterilization, which as you both pointed out doesn’t have a good track record. It would be a very slippery slope to determine who should undergo a procedure like that. I don’t think that’s something that we need. There’s gotta be a better alternative. I really hope that I come across a follow up to see what happens with the court.
@Ikwa - It truly is.
@SpOnTaNeOuS_sPiTbAlL - Yeah, sterilization just seems a bit extreme. I do hope they’re able to find an alternative.
@godisinthewind - I had wondered about whom she was having sex with as well and whether or not it could really be considered consensual if she’s really unable to make decisions about her own well being. Also, I think you have a great point about just how slippery the slope with this kind of decision. You want to make sure that children grow up in healthy environments but how much control can we really have over who chooses to reproduce without impeding on a person’s rights? It’s hard to know where that line is. Thanks for stopping by!
@the_rocking_of_socks - I really hope that aside from going to court, the mother is really working on the daughter to get her to consider some form of birth control. There’s gotta be a better alternative… I just don’t know what it is.